I want orange juice but there’s a cockroach down there and none of my roommates, well alex, she isn’t home to squish it dead and I want orange juice more now knowing I can’t have it and it was like right next to the fridge. I am having an awful day and I’m so tired of everything and I need to finish my damn essay. I’m really fed up with thinking. Like is it even possible to over think this much? It’s making me sick. I feel sick. And lonely. I almost made plans to go to Costa Rica. But I really haven’t the money for it. And I obviously didn’t but I wanted to. I also feel like I’m pushing kaiden away with my shitty negative attitude. I don/t really blame him at all, it’s understandable. I’m not really good at being a girlfriend. Stress gets to me and then I’m like no fun to be with. He’s not talking to me and I took a shower and it kind of made me feel better but yeah not really. I want to sleep it off but I feel so unproductive when I sleep and I’ve just been moping since I got home so I haven’t got anything done.